Paris, France

Tomorrow I hop a plan to Paris, France. It will be my first trip to Europe, and my first post-graduation-summer-fiasco. Hopefully there were will be many goodies to share after I return, I'll undoubtedly be up to some continuous sketching/collecting!

I did want to update before my journey and mention some really great things I've been enjoying lately:

The most obvious of anything you will find here today is Lady Gaga's new video for her most recent single "Alejandro". In many ways it makes up for the ways I personally felt that "Telephone" fell short, but I think my main issue there is that if you throw Beyonce into the mix you end up focusing on/dealing mainly with a heightened level or unattainable female sexuality that becomes mainly cartoonish, and one-dimensional. I really believe that Gaga's got puts an intentionally controversial twist on things, and coupled with someone like Beyonce her work loses a bit of its depth - needless to say I'm glad to see Gaga working solo again. Alejandro certainly pushes buttons, and pulls out stops. Check it out if you haven't already. After a bit more research I'll share my critical response.



I just finished reading Cunt by Inga Muscio, which I whole heartidly believe that all women should experience. It puts a lot of things in perspective in terms of being a woman in society today, and there are several points on each page that totally inspire you to feel proud and want to kick ass!

Tokyo Police Club just released their new album CHAMP, which I must admit is quite the masterpiece. These guys never disappoint, and I am thoroughly looking forward to their visit to the Grog Shop this July. Hopefully no one gets sick this time, because if they cancel on Cleveland again I will be one very disappointed lady. You can listen to their entire new album for free on their Myspace, although I would certainly recommend swinging by your local (independent) record store and picking up your own copy. I'm particularly drawn to "Favorite Food", "Favorite Colour", and "Bambi" - although the album is 100% solid all the way through.

"There's another girl and another day, and your favorite food still tastes the same"

"I'll get to know you better, but I'll never know you well."

(Just some lines for the times)

http://www.myspace.com/tokyopoliceclub


Take it easy, and tales and evidence of my French adventures coming soon!

<3 Sandi

Some things have happened recently that have really made me realize how uneven and impossible to measure everything truly is. I think about my BFA, and how it was supposed to be this giant, monumental event, and if I consider the accomplishment of graduation overall it really is. But when I get to thinking about how that hour actually went, and how I felt when it was over, it was hardly what I planned. BFAs went up, everyone performed, and then we tore them down again. What I remember is that I didn't feel changed. I certainly felt altered after undergrad on the whole, but never in the moments that I was prepared for it. I'm not sure if that's because of expectation or hype, or if pinpointing a cause even matters. The point is that life is built of ups and downs and that it is also unpredictable like everyone says it is, but what the don't mention is that all things are linked by a kind of underlying evenness that no one ever thinks to pay attention to. I don't believe that we can make any one moment or event more important than the next. We can make something extravagant, or attempt to line the odds up in our favor, but in a way it's sort of hopeless. Everyday is just another day. Sometimes extraordinary things do happen, but it is rarely if ever because we plan them. Everything that I consider to have had a profound effect on me as a person has happened on a day that I set out to call mundane.

What "Real" Meant

"We felt compassion, and the compassion tricked us" and we watched it change. And no one saw it move. And none of us knew, but suddenly the world was different and devoid of familiar form. And nothing fit. And every void was somehow deeper with ragged, awkward edges. It made me begin to wonder if all the solidarity had been a lie. I wondered if there were ever stability or the ground. I remembered a time that made more sense, but I couldn't remember the sense. I felt foolish and afraid. My head started spinning. I looked away from my feet. I looked up and to the side. I felt your absence, and that absence filled my chest. And I forgot the sounds you used to make and how familiar you used to feel. You had finally turned to memory, and maybe even to myth. That made me wonder if you had ever been real, and how I would justify that or even know what real meant.

"You grabbed my hand and we fell into it like a daydream, or a fever..."

New Work

Here are a few things I've either a.) finished recently or b.) neglected to document until now:

Titles, materials, and dimensions coming later...

BFA, BFA, BFA

The oral defense is less than two weeks away.

I discovered these drawings on BOOM this morning. I'm absolutely amazed by them! So relevant and related to my works as well. Beau-ti-ful:

Introducing Seth Clark, everyone - http://sethsclark.com/work/index.php?/art/abandoned/

I'm also loving all over this Lady Gaga/Nirvana mashup. DJ Lobsterdust:

http://hypem.com/track/918520/lobsterdust+-+NirGaga+Niravana+vs+Lady+Gaga+

Deer Tick - "20 Miles" Can't get enough of this one today. Sorry about the corny youtube video format.

Track Lighting

This is the really beautiful sketchbook that my roommate and best friend made for me. It's got neon salmon-colored pages. So it looks a lot like a watermelon in some sense, which I thoroughly enjoy:

I'm starting a little zine because I feel like it's finally the right time. (Funny that now is the "right time", given I've only got a little over two months to make work for my BFA hahah...ahhh) There will inevitably be some overlap between what turns up in there, and what I post here. That in mind I wanted to preview a small section of writing I made to include in my first issue. I think I often worry that my writing is to confessional. I guess I shouldn't spend too much time thinking about that.

I sat alone in the dark for a long time that night. I smacked my lips and said my own name out loud. I turned my stale gum inside out and snapped it across my front teeth. It tasted sour and spent. I stared off the porch, into the street, and past the houses just across the way. A train went by just beyond them and I welcomed the low shrieking of the wheels as it came and went in steady swells. A bead of sweat broke from my forehead and cut quickly down across my open eye. The salty stream burned as I tried to blink the dirty water free. I noticed the weathered rubber tips of your sneakers against the dry dead grass at my own feet. Lid closed, I massaged the corner of my left eye with the heal of my soiled palm. You asked my why I was still crying. I said, “fuck you” out loud and spit the small tacky wad I’d been grinding between my teeth at your worn black chucks. Nothing echoed and I didn’t look up. You put your foot down where my gum had landed and flattened it absent-mindedly across the pavement.